If there were no eternal consciousness in a man,
if at the foundation of all there lay only a wildly seething power
which writhing with obscure passions produced everything that is great
and everything that is insignificant,
if a bottomless void never satiated lay hidden beneath all
–what then would life be but despair?
If such were the case,
if there were no sacred bond which united mankind,
if one generation arose after another like the leafage in the forest,
if the one generation replaced the other like the song of birds in the forest,
if the human race passed through the world as the ship goes through the sea,
like the wind through the desert, a thoughtless and fruitless activity,
if an eternal oblivion were always lurking hungrily for its prey
and there was no power strong enough to wrest it from its maw
–how empty then and comfortless life would be!
Mr. MN: Please read this classic.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
Ham
When I was a kid growing around Hyderabad I saw this standard issue blue background white font governement style board titled National Institute of Amateur Radio stuck inorganically around a fast developing community in Somajiguda. Since anything with the words"amateur", "dilettante" attract me like a moth to the flame, I checked them out to find out about this. But then there was paperwork involved with an examination to pass, etc. which took it off my list.
Now after 15 years, I am finally licensed by the FCC to operate on amateur radio bands with the call sign KI6EGH. All thanks to my co-worker called Mike Myers (Yeah! He shares the same quality of making you laugh and think at the same time) who introduced me to this hobby and getting me my first transceiver. Did you know that Rajiv Gandhi met Sonia over ham radio (as a precursor to this modern day chatting). ? I forgot their call signs.
One of the first internet chat services was called ICQ with "CQ" being radio code for calling anyone over RF.Any of you hams reading this can reach me over the 2 meter band (usually around the 144.93 MHz range).
So this converts my official status of pig to a ham :)
Now after 15 years, I am finally licensed by the FCC to operate on amateur radio bands with the call sign KI6EGH. All thanks to my co-worker called Mike Myers (Yeah! He shares the same quality of making you laugh and think at the same time) who introduced me to this hobby and getting me my first transceiver. Did you know that Rajiv Gandhi met Sonia over ham radio (as a precursor to this modern day chatting). ? I forgot their call signs.
One of the first internet chat services was called ICQ with "CQ" being radio code for calling anyone over RF.Any of you hams reading this can reach me over the 2 meter band (usually around the 144.93 MHz range).
So this converts my official status of pig to a ham :)
Saturday, June 10, 2006
Of Castor & Pollux...
Hmm..Almost a month since my last posting and my social life looks as empty as hell. This problem of not thinking about one's folks' is the other end of the spectrum problem of crushing loneliness (in fact I think this end causes the other end to happen).better to have too much work than its alternative...have flown to east coast 2 times in the last 20 days and now on the road to LA..
I would like use my little space here to jot down all who matter the most to me but couldnt get to wish in time. [Drumrolls in the background]
Belated Returns of the Day P, Hope your first bday in marital bliss is well spent...
(Piano)
Happy Bday M..Sorry I cannot attend your wedding but wanted to let you know that I am happy for you and extend my welcome to her from the family..
Kiddo, Have a Jolly good time at the training and hopefully you are wiser by this birthday (relative to the last). You know the extent of my corporatization when I say throw the party and expense it to me..Either ways really glad hearing news about you from Pa.
(Pipli..)
Guthhi.I know your day loiters around the week of June 7-13 but not quite sure..See..I made your wish come true..All that alcohol has a memory loss aspect particularly when it comes to your bday.
(Special Trumpets playing the sine wave harmonics)
Mr. MN, As naturally as M follows N, you would be chasing some girls (either in reality or in dreams) on your day.I cant help with that but here's a thought that makes it easier.This is gonna be your last frickin day to be spent celibate. Either of 2 things happen and you know what they are..Sorry for harassing you over the web like this but as usual, my warm wishes bud!
(Bass Guital! Tchhhorus !)
Finally, the best of all, my mom. Here's wishing you health and happiness Ma..
(Orchestra!)
Sunday, May 07, 2006
The TimeScale of the Mythic Indian Universe
* A lousy random rambling follows *
Calendars always held my fancy because of the way we strike out order of the chaos. Imagine the day when the sun first set and a caveman who missed the sun immediately blamed his next door neighbor for the debacle of sun setting (probably might have killed him for this crime as well). Then the next day when sun rises again probably he wouldnt congratulate his next door neighbor(remember, he is dead) and would have repented his deed thus marking the time/place for further oblations. So there is a need for calendar for one of these events.
* End of the lousy random rambling *
Well, anyways people want to remember events and things in a nice way. Since as one involved with computers we seek to attack a problem in general ways than in special ways, my thought begat a question as to whats the oldest thing one can remember? Or more generally whats the oldest memory of human civilization? Our legends, folklores, mythology and religious anecdotes. Each civilization has its own but I want to think about one which is in the Indian consciousness and the following comes from reading the myths of the hindus.
* Start of a Functional Theory *
A cycle (kalpa) is first defined as a single day in the life of a creator,(usually Brahma but thats not relevant here) which is also assigned as the lifetime of the milyway galaxy.The further breakdown of a cycle is established as being equivalent to 12,000 years of the gods.Now, this is interesting for the fact that the gods themselves are not supreme and subject to a higher accountability. The equivalence of 12,000 god-years is 4,320,000,000 earth-years. (In english that translates as four billion three hundred twenty million years and to put in context the solar system itself is currently estimated to be 4.54 billiong years.At the close of a day everything is resolved into chaos (pralaya). Slate Clean. When the creator wakes up and then does some accounting as to who goes into higher plane (beyond all 3 worlds) and then recreates all 3 worlds (only latent germ of neccesary stuff from the old is preserved for remanifestation). These 3 worlds have be populated with folks whose histories in the previous cycle deem them to be.
Apparently the night has to be equal to that of a day in the time frame of the creator for the above to ensue.
Now the most interesting question of who's watching the watcher. Namely, how is time distributed to the creator himself? This has the answer that our creator (who can never be known but aspects of him can be rediscovered) is assigned a 100 creator-years. At the end of this assigned time not only the three worlds, gods, men, all things are merged into the chaos but essentially the creator himself should self-destruct. This is called "maha-pralaya". This particular period lasts for another 100 creator-years when there will be a new creator and his new creation. The only forces are the causality from actions in the past and sometimes neccessity (which is orthogonal to reason and emotions). That is both evolution and involution are represented as neccesary but no logic is assigned to it. So far theses is the major alternations on a macro scale.
Now, consider the so called "minor" alternations in the day of the creator. A single day is composed of 14 manvantaras. (manu is the generic name for a teacher and antara is the time elapsed between sections). At the end of each section, as usual, the world is deluged swallowing continents and living beings.
Now for the further decomposition of the single day in the life of a creator into yugas.A "maha-yuga" equals a 1000 yuga cycles. A single yuga cycle can be decomposed into 4 parts as Satya,Treta, Dvapara and Kali. The first consists of one million seven hundred twenty-eight thousand (1,728,000) years., the second one million two hundred ninety-six thousand (1,296,000), the third eight hundred sixty-four thousand (864,000) and the last four hundred thirty-two thousand (432,000).
Lets see if the math adds up. A single yuga cycle equals 1,720,000+1,296,000+864,000+432,000 = 4,320,000. A thousand yugs equal a single kalpa so multiplying this number by 1000 gives us the earth years number exact. Atleast this sticks.
* End of Functional Theory *
If we were to abode by the above theory then currently the year is 2006. This is the 6006 year of Kaliyuga of the present maha-yuga (leaves us 425994 years more to go before we blow up). This "maha-yuga" is the 28th maha-yuga in the seventh manvantara of our kalpa.( for those interested in names, the presiding manu is Vaivasvata and the kalpa is called Varaha).A little more "recent" events to give a sense of where we are is that Mahabharata happened during Treta yuga and Ramayana in Dvapara.
Of if you prefer more chronological events, the birth of Brahma at the first kalpa out of a lotus (so we all know lotuses are older than Brahma :), the boar incarnation in the first, ganjendra moksham (elephant liberated from crocodile) in the fourth and the churning of the ocean in the sixth kalpa.
Phew! Fatboy slim said the same thing in much compressed format :)
Calendars always held my fancy because of the way we strike out order of the chaos. Imagine the day when the sun first set and a caveman who missed the sun immediately blamed his next door neighbor for the debacle of sun setting (probably might have killed him for this crime as well). Then the next day when sun rises again probably he wouldnt congratulate his next door neighbor(remember, he is dead) and would have repented his deed thus marking the time/place for further oblations. So there is a need for calendar for one of these events.
* End of the lousy random rambling *
Well, anyways people want to remember events and things in a nice way. Since as one involved with computers we seek to attack a problem in general ways than in special ways, my thought begat a question as to whats the oldest thing one can remember? Or more generally whats the oldest memory of human civilization? Our legends, folklores, mythology and religious anecdotes. Each civilization has its own but I want to think about one which is in the Indian consciousness and the following comes from reading the myths of the hindus.
* Start of a Functional Theory *
A cycle (kalpa) is first defined as a single day in the life of a creator,(usually Brahma but thats not relevant here) which is also assigned as the lifetime of the milyway galaxy.The further breakdown of a cycle is established as being equivalent to 12,000 years of the gods.Now, this is interesting for the fact that the gods themselves are not supreme and subject to a higher accountability. The equivalence of 12,000 god-years is 4,320,000,000 earth-years. (In english that translates as four billion three hundred twenty million years and to put in context the solar system itself is currently estimated to be 4.54 billiong years.At the close of a day everything is resolved into chaos (pralaya). Slate Clean. When the creator wakes up and then does some accounting as to who goes into higher plane (beyond all 3 worlds) and then recreates all 3 worlds (only latent germ of neccesary stuff from the old is preserved for remanifestation). These 3 worlds have be populated with folks whose histories in the previous cycle deem them to be.
Apparently the night has to be equal to that of a day in the time frame of the creator for the above to ensue.
Now the most interesting question of who's watching the watcher. Namely, how is time distributed to the creator himself? This has the answer that our creator (who can never be known but aspects of him can be rediscovered) is assigned a 100 creator-years. At the end of this assigned time not only the three worlds, gods, men, all things are merged into the chaos but essentially the creator himself should self-destruct. This is called "maha-pralaya". This particular period lasts for another 100 creator-years when there will be a new creator and his new creation. The only forces are the causality from actions in the past and sometimes neccessity (which is orthogonal to reason and emotions). That is both evolution and involution are represented as neccesary but no logic is assigned to it. So far theses is the major alternations on a macro scale.
Now, consider the so called "minor" alternations in the day of the creator. A single day is composed of 14 manvantaras. (manu is the generic name for a teacher and antara is the time elapsed between sections). At the end of each section, as usual, the world is deluged swallowing continents and living beings.
Now for the further decomposition of the single day in the life of a creator into yugas.A "maha-yuga" equals a 1000 yuga cycles. A single yuga cycle can be decomposed into 4 parts as Satya,Treta, Dvapara and Kali. The first consists of one million seven hundred twenty-eight thousand (1,728,000) years., the second one million two hundred ninety-six thousand (1,296,000), the third eight hundred sixty-four thousand (864,000) and the last four hundred thirty-two thousand (432,000).
Lets see if the math adds up. A single yuga cycle equals 1,720,000+1,296,000+864,000+432,000 = 4,320,000. A thousand yugs equal a single kalpa so multiplying this number by 1000 gives us the earth years number exact. Atleast this sticks.
* End of Functional Theory *
If we were to abode by the above theory then currently the year is 2006. This is the 6006 year of Kaliyuga of the present maha-yuga (leaves us 425994 years more to go before we blow up). This "maha-yuga" is the 28th maha-yuga in the seventh manvantara of our kalpa.( for those interested in names, the presiding manu is Vaivasvata and the kalpa is called Varaha).A little more "recent" events to give a sense of where we are is that Mahabharata happened during Treta yuga and Ramayana in Dvapara.
Of if you prefer more chronological events, the birth of Brahma at the first kalpa out of a lotus (so we all know lotuses are older than Brahma :), the boar incarnation in the first, ganjendra moksham (elephant liberated from crocodile) in the fourth and the churning of the ocean in the sixth kalpa.
Phew! Fatboy slim said the same thing in much compressed format :)
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Selection Functions
After a brief brush with matrimonial exerscises six months back, my parents gave me back the baton to proceed as I see fit and let them know of my choice. I havent done anything on that front till the last week and my folks were slowly thinking about wresting back the control knobs for accelerating this process, which brings me to this musing.
In an effort to see what can be done via online communuties, I did the usual thingy of putting up my profile and stuff. It also happens that you can search for people based on certain search criteria. I have seen profiles that were straitjacketed into the standard a/s/l, hobbies,demographic data, etc. almost like I am analysing census data for this year. These are profiles that never moved me despite the desi tradition of micromanaging the details .The only part of this standardized user interface o, where personas can be expressed happened in the section where people write about themselves, the free form text field where you write something (with the assumption that the person willing to be married is writing it as opposed to someone else in the family or friends). This is the only bit where someone's taste shows up. Sadly, most folks put in 2 liners like "I am a [adjective], [adjective] and [adjective] person. To know more, write to me." Some of the stuff is written by parents in ALL CAPS thus making it seem like they are akin to a towncrier advertising for the latest news or what have you. Then there are folks who spout inanities like "I am a fun-loving person". (who isnt? ) or some blanket statement like "I am a broad minded person" whereas in their partner preferences you see a contradiction that contracts the sample space for that person's search is almost zero within the same online matrimonial site (or their competitor). If you dont believe me, you should try this just for the heck of it. In essence, it is very confusing for me. I know I should proceed it the way I do and use the online thing just as a selection criteria for further distillation but somehow something in me tells I am missing out on something of a protocol that is very well understood by these folks.
I understand the Darwinian theory attributes that selection of mates is not based on how intelligent/rational/elegant the mating partner is, but more for survival and reproducability. That is, if I have an Einstein, a Farmer and a Woman who can bear 10 children, the darwinian selection algorithm would choose the woman which means the genius of einstein would be lost for the next generation.
One of the first projects I was involved was, in a genetic algorithm for a game called "Reversi" where it was upto our group to decide what we wanted to code into our so called utiility function that would be used as a criteria by another selection function to make the best move in a given situation. We just coded it to do one thing alone (which was dont care for the opponents' score but aim for getting the diagnoal squares) and it worked well enough that it beat one of the best humans to play the game. Thrice. That was our professor.But then that was a simple term project.
I recollect there was an experiment done by neurosurgeons who removed the part of brain responsible for emotions,etc so that they have this cold calculating human who will always be rational and make the best move. Guess What? The fellow couldnt get out of his hospital bed as his brain was thrown into a loop about calculating should he get up or not. The point here being that emotions feed the rationality of the brain. Each half cannot survive without the other.
So all in all, I need to have a particular selection criteria so that I can set my partner preferences in those (just maligned) online matrimony sites. I think it can be put in one statement : "I should choose someone for no reason at all". That is, I shouldnt be able to express why I like a certain person. If I can say I like so and so because of these xyz reasons, then the lack of xyz in future would cause some issues.( not really a bright logic here but serves the justification) . So the best selection algorithm available for me is that I should like someone but for no reason whatsoever that making sure that I have no reason to dislike her too. Strangely this starts to sound like a Caffeine Deficiency Syndrome posts by gvenum. That means I have to stop now :-)
In an effort to see what can be done via online communuties, I did the usual thingy of putting up my profile and stuff. It also happens that you can search for people based on certain search criteria. I have seen profiles that were straitjacketed into the standard a/s/l, hobbies,demographic data, etc. almost like I am analysing census data for this year. These are profiles that never moved me despite the desi tradition of micromanaging the details .The only part of this standardized user interface o, where personas can be expressed happened in the section where people write about themselves, the free form text field where you write something (with the assumption that the person willing to be married is writing it as opposed to someone else in the family or friends). This is the only bit where someone's taste shows up. Sadly, most folks put in 2 liners like "I am a [adjective], [adjective] and [adjective] person. To know more, write to me." Some of the stuff is written by parents in ALL CAPS thus making it seem like they are akin to a towncrier advertising for the latest news or what have you. Then there are folks who spout inanities like "I am a fun-loving person". (who isnt? ) or some blanket statement like "I am a broad minded person" whereas in their partner preferences you see a contradiction that contracts the sample space for that person's search is almost zero within the same online matrimonial site (or their competitor). If you dont believe me, you should try this just for the heck of it. In essence, it is very confusing for me. I know I should proceed it the way I do and use the online thing just as a selection criteria for further distillation but somehow something in me tells I am missing out on something of a protocol that is very well understood by these folks.
I understand the Darwinian theory attributes that selection of mates is not based on how intelligent/rational/elegant the mating partner is, but more for survival and reproducability. That is, if I have an Einstein, a Farmer and a Woman who can bear 10 children, the darwinian selection algorithm would choose the woman which means the genius of einstein would be lost for the next generation.
One of the first projects I was involved was, in a genetic algorithm for a game called "Reversi" where it was upto our group to decide what we wanted to code into our so called utiility function that would be used as a criteria by another selection function to make the best move in a given situation. We just coded it to do one thing alone (which was dont care for the opponents' score but aim for getting the diagnoal squares) and it worked well enough that it beat one of the best humans to play the game. Thrice. That was our professor.But then that was a simple term project.
I recollect there was an experiment done by neurosurgeons who removed the part of brain responsible for emotions,etc so that they have this cold calculating human who will always be rational and make the best move. Guess What? The fellow couldnt get out of his hospital bed as his brain was thrown into a loop about calculating should he get up or not. The point here being that emotions feed the rationality of the brain. Each half cannot survive without the other.
So all in all, I need to have a particular selection criteria so that I can set my partner preferences in those (just maligned) online matrimony sites. I think it can be put in one statement : "I should choose someone for no reason at all". That is, I shouldnt be able to express why I like a certain person. If I can say I like so and so because of these xyz reasons, then the lack of xyz in future would cause some issues.( not really a bright logic here but serves the justification) . So the best selection algorithm available for me is that I should like someone but for no reason whatsoever that making sure that I have no reason to dislike her too. Strangely this starts to sound like a Caffeine Deficiency Syndrome posts by gvenum. That means I have to stop now :-)
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
The God Abandons Anthony
"When suddenly there is heard at midnight
A company passing invincible
With wonderful music, with voices, -Your fortune giving way now,
your works, Which have failed, the plans of a lifetime
All turned illusions, do not mourn uselessly.
As one prepared long since, courageously,
Say farewell to her, to Alexandria who is leaving.
Above all do not be tricked, never say it was All a dream,
and that your hearing was deceived;
Do not stop to such vain hopes as these.
As one prepared long since, courageously,
As becomes one worthy as you were of such a city,
Firmly draw near the window,
And listen with emotion but not with the complainings and entreaties of cowards,
Listen, your last enjoyment, to the sounds,
The wonderful instruments of the mystic company,
And say farewell, farewell to Alexandria you are losing.
***
--> by Constantinos P. CavafySaturday, April 15, 2006
Another Season
Its been a while since I was here. Occasionally a hiatus from anything you do can only be good. It teaches you a lot of things. For the last 90 days I havent been in touch with my folks or did things over weekends that I normally was used to. It taught me how far could I go without breaking down and what more important to me in life from the perspective of values.
I didnt write because I didnt feel like it. When I have started writing here, I was frequent because words conveyed more than silence. I stop when I feel that words cannot outperform silence. Its amazing how my brain makes connections to work even though I do other things.( For example the earlier spent make me think that on the internet we compress things like text files only because the time spent in compression/decompression more than compensates for the propogation time of the same content over a network). Of late, I have also discovered a special joy of programming in python. While I am complete novice to it, I highly recommend the experience of solving a problem using this language. The reason it was joy was because the language lends itself to expressing your exact one thought into one idion as opposed to being strewn into multiple idioms which spoil the integrity of your intent.
Now that I seem to find enough time for myself over the weekends, I was lost for things to do over the weekend. Then I realised that listening to old music, driving aimlessly and devouring some books are things that really balance my personal life(the same old ones but rediscovered after a gap). I have to mention that reading about mythology is always fun because I subscribe to the theory that myths have far more potency than the plain reality of current affairs.
And its been an year since I relocated to the Bay Area from the East Coast. Gosh! It feels like I have been here for more than that (if you are really counting in Dog Years, yeah!) . It was sunny and felt like I was in Mexico when I first came here. Now, We have been under continous onslaught of heavy rains till today and it is supposed to be spring. Here's wishing for the best of this spring.Time to really turn a new leaf green...
I didnt write because I didnt feel like it. When I have started writing here, I was frequent because words conveyed more than silence. I stop when I feel that words cannot outperform silence. Its amazing how my brain makes connections to work even though I do other things.( For example the earlier spent make me think that on the internet we compress things like text files only because the time spent in compression/decompression more than compensates for the propogation time of the same content over a network). Of late, I have also discovered a special joy of programming in python. While I am complete novice to it, I highly recommend the experience of solving a problem using this language. The reason it was joy was because the language lends itself to expressing your exact one thought into one idion as opposed to being strewn into multiple idioms which spoil the integrity of your intent.
Now that I seem to find enough time for myself over the weekends, I was lost for things to do over the weekend. Then I realised that listening to old music, driving aimlessly and devouring some books are things that really balance my personal life(the same old ones but rediscovered after a gap). I have to mention that reading about mythology is always fun because I subscribe to the theory that myths have far more potency than the plain reality of current affairs.
And its been an year since I relocated to the Bay Area from the East Coast. Gosh! It feels like I have been here for more than that (if you are really counting in Dog Years, yeah!) . It was sunny and felt like I was in Mexico when I first came here. Now, We have been under continous onslaught of heavy rains till today and it is supposed to be spring. Here's wishing for the best of this spring.Time to really turn a new leaf green...
Saturday, April 01, 2006
April Fool
April Fool,
Go to School
Tell your teacher that you are a bloody fool.
I learnt that at my elementary school 20 years back and this was a day when you were at you were cautious best and the best day to be paranoid. It served its purpose well and one of the best jokes was that it was a holiday. (Call up a fellow student and say its a holiday because its April 1 and engage him in a serious discussion of how the old nordic/celtic/druid/whatever started their new year today and the romans screwed it up by adding extra months and we have January instead of April, till his head spins in a dizzy and tell him that the school is intent on setting the record straight and hence a holiday just like January 1)
Happy April Fool's Day!
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Gametime
A deal is at a critical point and people start counting on you as every minute of the clock ticking is a minute taken away from the deal. You are playing the last quarter with 120 seconds left on the table. You play catch up and even down the difference to 1 point but only 40 seconds left. Then you take a shot at a 3 pointer and miss. On rebound your opponent scores a 2 points with 24 seconds left for you to do what you wanna do. You dont wanna miss this time, so you dribble hard and have the normal 2 points. No major surprises here. Clock's at 12 seconds with the opponent controlling the ball. You intercept a pass with god knows what and take possesion of the ball and call timeout. 7 seconds left and you can either shoot or pass.Then you remember your gods (in this case Jordan helps) and at the whistle you dribble a bit and the clock is at 3 seconds when you go for the all-out 3 pointer. You gasp, watch the parabolic trajectory with a bated breath, the ball bounces a bit and then returns to the basket at the end of the game. Phew!!
Someone once said to be succesful you need to give everything you have got and more. I never understood this more better than today. Now I now what it feels like to be under gametime pressure and I am glad I survived one. Its an undescribable exhiliration you feel at the end of it. You feel more alive than you usually do.
As soon as the next game begins, all this exuberance is history but till then its good to be kicking some butt every now and then.
"Quick Watson, The Game's Afoot!"
Someone once said to be succesful you need to give everything you have got and more. I never understood this more better than today. Now I now what it feels like to be under gametime pressure and I am glad I survived one. Its an undescribable exhiliration you feel at the end of it. You feel more alive than you usually do.
As soon as the next game begins, all this exuberance is history but till then its good to be kicking some butt every now and then.
"Quick Watson, The Game's Afoot!"
Thursday, March 23, 2006
The Importance of Delusions
Hmm. I have deluded myself that I will write an email soon to a dear friend, post a new blog, call some folks back home and also keep in touch with somebody. But then I didnt do any of that in the last 2 months or ever since I came back from home.
I have been wondering about the neccisity of delusions in one's life. A mother has to delude herself into thinking that she loves her kids even though the reality might be otherwise and this delusion pays off over time. Abhimanyu did know that he can never come out of the "padmavyuha" alive (because he didnt know the way out) but had to think he can so that he can do his job at the center of it.
Similarly I am deluding myself of certain things. Even though they never might happen, its useful in the sense that it drives me to achieve further more than what I would have done apart from keeping me happy for a while. I think they have a term called "Vantage Point Effect" in psychology. In the end it sounds like Luky Ali's lyrics
I have been wondering about the neccisity of delusions in one's life. A mother has to delude herself into thinking that she loves her kids even though the reality might be otherwise and this delusion pays off over time. Abhimanyu did know that he can never come out of the "padmavyuha" alive (because he didnt know the way out) but had to think he can so that he can do his job at the center of it.
Similarly I am deluding myself of certain things. Even though they never might happen, its useful in the sense that it drives me to achieve further more than what I would have done apart from keeping me happy for a while. I think they have a term called "Vantage Point Effect" in psychology. In the end it sounds like Luky Ali's lyrics
"Ho Jaaye to mein raazi Hoon
Kho Jaaye to mein Baaki Hoon
Yu Samajtha hoon"
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)