Saturday, January 05, 2008

This is not my post



Its become a fashion for me to forget people's birthdays and exceptional when I remember. This time it was a very good pal of mine but then I am known to forget even my best friends. I also miss calling up my own relatives and other folks (my phone bill when 8 years ago was consistently $300 ) whereas now if $60. Not that we all use the instant electronic mailing to each other to write long emails (I occasionally do when I am in the mood for letter writing). Luckily no one important to me seems to hold it against me. Then I wondered why is it that people closest to me get a raw deal while I tend to atleast remember those who I think arent that connected.(If a client/co worker says his anniversary is coming up or a birthday comes up I somehow tend to remember in the short term to ask how it went) Somehow, in the back of your mind, you know friends would always be there (this was the philosophy M used when he used to ditch my appointments when a girl came along ) whereas for acquaintances you needed to be careful in not slipping up through the formalities (like wishing on a festival and other pleasantries our society has grown to believe in).

If I reflect more on this, I came to realise that most of my good pals do not mistake in my not calling them/not wishing them/or other symbols or images of being in touch as lack of affection or any other not so implied things. Its kind of hard but beautifully expressed by the above surreal painting which translates into "This is not a Pipe" which cuts at many levels deep like a Quentin Tarantino movie.

Simply put: the map is not territory and a map is useless when you know the territory very well. So we can do away with maps like "greeting card "/"phone call "/"email" and the likes. Conversely for a new person a map is extremely important to navigate unchartered territory of the other person and hence you can be judged harshly (as in not really relating to 'your' reality) if you give them poor maps/images. Hmmm...I shall stop now before I go into regression!

ps: On further thinking: Why take a chance.? Better late in wishing than never. Happy New Year to all of you and Happy belated birthdays to all of you that I missed last year and also many belated wishes for all Diwali,Eid, Christmas, Chanukkah , etc..etc .. This way I can cover for one years worth of missing out.
pps: I know, I am truly shameless (thats the correct answer in conclusion)

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